Sometimes We Just Need A Little Butter
As a long-time studio owner and teacher, I’ve seen many students and yoga teachers come through our doors who desperately need to slow down.
For the sake of their health, their sanity, and that of others around them who work with them and love them, they need to practice the art of doing less, instead of doing more. Their energy is so intense that it is hard to be in their presence. I can intuitively feel their central nervous systems getting ready to crash – like a gas pedal in a car stuck – steamrolling toward a big physical crash, emotional breakdown, or revving up to lash out at others.
One student who was like this whom I will never forget walked into our Center and began taking class after class, thinking she had to learn it all right now. She hated the slower classes, and although those were the ones she desperately needed, she simply could not slow down that much. She asked for private sessions to make sure she was getting all of the poses “right.”
I assigned her to Tammy, a wonderful teacher who also had very high energy, but was embracing the principles of SOFT YOGA that she was learning at our studio, A Gentle Way. After several sessions, I asked Tammy how our student was progressing. She replied, shaking her head: “I told her, ‘Girl, you need to eat some butter!’”
Over the years, I have seen so many women taking and teaching yoga who cut out everything in their life that is rich, yummy and comforting, thinking that this is the path that will lead them to the perfect body, perfect health, or the approval they are seeking. But many of them are so unhappy! And creating unhappiness for those around them!
The path of Yoga for householders (those of us who work in the everyday world and do everyday sorts of things) is not about denying ourselves anything. It is about balance and moderation in all things. It is not a destination, but a practice.
Sometimes, a little butter (softness, richness) is needed in life, just as a little butter can take toast from dry and hard to soft and delicious. Many doctors have even come back around this decade to explain how a little butter helps your body, not hurts it as we once were told. There is a saying I always use while helping my students through relaxation: “
Imagine your body is butter melting into the floor.” If you take a square of cold butter and just stick it on that toast, it just sits there, doing nothing. You get way too much of it as you bite into the toast, and too much cold butter just tastes like cold fat. But butter that is warmed, even slightly, spreads evenly across the toast. It soaks perfectly into the bread, adding moisture and bringing out the best flavor in both the bread and the butter. The breathing and relaxation techniques we teach in Soft Yoga first warm the body, then spread that warmth evenly throughout the body, like butter, balancing the body and the mind. The more we learn to relax and let go before a stretch or an asana (pose), the safer the pose will be, and the deeper it will integrate into our energy bodies.
When we are balanced in body and mind, we do not give off chaotic energy. Rather, we are in a place where we enjoy life more, and our friends and loved ones enjoy us more. From a scientific perspective, it is very important to learn how to “switch” our-selves from the sympathetic (“fight or flight”) nervous system, the one that’s al-ways going or doing, to the parasympathetic (“rest and digest”) nervous system, the one that allows us to heal, restore, and renew.
If we do not learn how to con-sciously do this, our bodies and minds will burn out well before their time, like a vehicle that has been run way too long, too hard, and never given time to cool or replenish its important fluids. If you are a high-energy type of person who has a hard time slowing down, my suggestion for you today is to play with finding the softest, slowest style yoga you can, and practice this style several times a week.
Think of these classes as your “meditation-in-movement,” not as exercise or stretch sessions, although they may include deep stretches. Focus on your breath and on integrating your mind into each inhale, each exhale, each precious moment and slow movement. For you, this just may be the hardest yoga you will ever do, but the rewards will be great. Your body, your mind, and your friends and family will thank you.
Footnote:Although our Center is known for slower and softer yoga, the slowest or physically “easiest” classes may not always be the right classes for you. It took me twenty years of practicing yoga and working with many different types of bodies and personalities to realize that, for some people, practicing Sun Salutation (which is a series of faster movements practiced in our more physically dynamic classes) is a way for them to slow down for them, where it would be a big cardio workout for me.
This is why we offer a variety of yoga styles where everyone can learn to gear down at their own pace. So if you are new to our Center, or new to yoga, please email me for a free 15-consultation, or book a private session with one of our senior staff so that we can help you find the very best teacher and class style to help you slow down and add a little butter to your practice. If you do not live in San Diego, I invite you to join us at our next Retreat or teacher training offering. Go to our website for details.
